ledger

I don't look, and I don't see
I hold it back from everybody
I figure it out, the only way I can
a narrow ledge with sharp incline
stepping over all that won't hurt
just for once, it almost works

it scratches and claws to find a way out
all the reasons that I think about
a part of me that I won't show
pushed to the back so no one knows
I hit rewind to where it all began
they don't listen or understand
but I know--but I know
what it's all about

the divinity of what's silently written
the ledger full of numbers and superstitions
like the mountains to the north with the same name
where saguaro grow and don't lay blame
a coyote howls in the dead of night
singing the phrases of its own plight
hungering for all that it longs to possess
out there in the lonely wilderness

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

would you?

would you climb a mountain
to get to me?
would you sail across
a stormy sea?
would you ride the desert
an oasis to find?
would you answer
what stays unresolved
in my mind?

would you listen with heart
to questions I ask?
would you break the hunger
with sweet repast?
would you sing me a song
others haven't heard?
or hum me a tune
forgetting the words?

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

destiny

destiny is a funny thing
it can pass you buy without even winking
you can laugh it off with smooth composure
the photo shows as overexposure

sanity rests on a rocky mountainside
no rain for days, it's arid and dry
there is lightning from the heat
lack of thunder makes it incomplete

blood seeps red and drops in code
thoughts will make your heart explode
destiny...an accident waiting to happen
what once rested smooth is now misshapen

call it destiny or maybe kismet
maybe there's one you haven't met yet
pack all your stuff in one neat bag
hoping whoever opens will read the tag

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

more than you'll ever know

I chased the lightning across the dark
felt the thunder where the demons are parked
stood in the rain to let it cleanse
saw my soul through a crystalline lens

I rung out the drops but still stood wet
couldn't put it aside or ever forget
it's buried too deep and the cleanse isn't pure
no matter how many storms I endure

the morning comes and the sun shines hot
did you ever love me or did you not?
my spirit stays damp and will never dry out
when I think its gone...new thoughts sprout

I climbed the mountain and shout the words
they echo scaring the animals that heard
I stare at the valley stretched below
remembering more than you'll ever know

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

inside, outside

inside chambers hidden deep...
inside tissue, capillary and vein...
inside pumps the memories of love...

outside showing for all to see...
a negative of transparency...
projected on ambivalence...

inside, outside all gets mixed...
spilling over when it gets too thick...
can they see me inside out...

am I outside looking in...

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

no avail

like a hamster on a wheel
I spin and turn to get nowhere
the end is the beginning
the beginning is the end
around and around and around I spin

I move forward...you step back
too many times I've done this dance
glad I'm not afraid of heights
from ups and downs and sleight of hand
movements I don't understand

all the balls kept in the air
expertly, you keep them there
my proverbial hamster wheel
spins and turns to no avail

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

undone

you had made up your mind
to leave it all behind
but you left some things undone
when the time came for you to run

there was nothing left in that place
that could make you want to stay
the ties that kept you there
never answered by your prayers

so you traveled to the West
to scenery that you loved best
trying to start again
rebuild and make new friends

you could never shake your past
a monkey on your back
the things you left undone
in your dreams a constant rerun

so you go back one last time
face the jurors for your crimes
the sentence you can't bear
you should have left it there

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Dulcinea

Dulcinea sits in wonder
as Don Quixote wanders about
fighting his brood of windmill warriors
white sails billowing in the wind

Dulcinea knows his illusion
confusing victor of the spoils
while he conquers his unseen enemy
she ponders her life alone

Dulcinea, Quixote's allusion
beauty fair and loving deep
like the windmills in his mind
alas, she is also not real

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

static

I've pushed through the whys and the why nots
buried the haves and the have nots
wandered and wondered
why there's not order
in this buzzing mind

I hear the white noise late at night
can't answer the questions that cause this hiss
like the static an antenna creates
unresolved, inside it all lays

tell me how did you rid it all?
eliminate the buzz and all of its fuzz
this constant humming, incessant drumming
that plagues my days and nights
this white noise that won't go away

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

neon lights

nowhere in the neon lights
does it say hold on for your dear life
we grab the bridle and dig our heels in
bouncing around as it kicks and spins

you sit in the diner--it's near midnight
you can see the damnedest sights
stirring your coffee trying not to stare
at what's in here or hiding out there

we can never quite let go
holding on till hell freezes over
witticism only takes you so far
miles roll fast when you're in your car

the bitter tolls and burdens of sins
the fences we build that keep us in
begging to be misunderstood
as you turn your back and leave for good

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

truths about me

I have seen the quizzes
answers by those that think they know
"truths about me"
though, all they see
the facade of me
hidden in all but my poems

I have read your works
hidden meanings
carefully put feelings
lines and lines
innuendo, plain and true

unlock your door
release what is there
go forth and prosper
it may not be proper
political suicide

here I sit, waiting
monsoons come and go
thunder claps and lightning bolts
sometimes blinding clarity
other times, not so much

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

minutes

when instant gratification
just isn't fast enough
the sun still heats your morning
the full moon calls your bluff
the saguaro has no answers
the nightingale has been snuffed
you call upon me for wisdom
you don't have the right stuff

momma raised you better
but you go off half cocked
leaving all around you
pretty much shell-shocked
you've been running for miles
just not outside of your block
and you are always racing...
racing against the clock

in the end you loved
exactly what you picked
fate is a lonely hunter
consequence makes you sick
you're in way too deep
fog grows white and thick
the second hand keeps running
as the minutes slowly click

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License