Tuesday, June 30, 2020

I'm looking

I'm not looking for a hero
or a knight in shining armor
not looking for a king or prince
or a legend not yet born
I'm just looking for something
that I can't seem to find
I've been looking for quite awhile
but I'm gonna take my time

I'm looking for generosity
for passion and for truth
I'm looking for a cowboy
James Bond, and Indiana too
I'm looking for someone who will miss me
when I'm not by their side
someone to create some excitement
and bring loving to my life

I'm looking for someone to hold me
until I fall to sleep
maybe then dreams will return
when my heart finds some peace
I'm looking for someone to take my hand
and squeeze it really tight
I'm looking for a love song
a poet to write my life
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Monday, June 29, 2020

the edge

you drove me to it, right to the edge
you took my hand then pushed me off the ledge
you said "jump..I'll catch you when you fall"
but you weren't there--after all

you said "love me"..I asked "how much"
you said "deeply"..and I felt the rush
as it flew right past me, like a bullet in the air
and off you went, with ne'er a care

you said "goodbye"..and I asked "why"
you said "because"..your only reply
I should have seen it coming, you weren't really here
the object of my affection was further than it appeared

you drove me to it, right to the edge
you took my hand then pushed me off the ledge
you said "jump..I'll catch you when you fall"
but you weren't there--after all
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a river called Hope

there once was a river, a river called Hope
when it rained in the desert, the Hope would flow
but too much sun has left the soil parched
now the banks are dry, the Hope has dried up

the critters are dying, no where for them to drink
plants are shriveling as they turn brown and shrink
still the sun beats down on this arid basin
no chances of rain on what once was an oasis

there once was a river, a river called Hope
when it rained in the desert, the Hope would flow
if I immersed my soul, it would be cleansed
but the Hope doesn't flow, over or within
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dead center

where do you get off?
my heart used as a target
you hit dead center
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Connecting

They met because of wanting
Connected because of desire
Each of them were planning,
to set the other's world on fire

Connecting on all levels,
body, soul and mind
Exploring each other completely
to see what they can find

Warm and fervent kisses
the exploring has just begun
Passion triumphs in the end
So now they both have won!

Sunday, June 28, 2020

Yesterday

there won't come a monsoon or a crescent moon
a song that Bill sings that doesn't remind me
a dance in the spring, a book that I read
that doesn't remind me of you

there won't come a dream and how they seemed
a fantasy of sand and the sea
a Yesterday place, the sweet spot you grace
that I have buried deep down in my heart
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Saturday, June 27, 2020

keeper

I drink my morning latte
you're drinking chocolate milk
I'm eating a french pastry
you're eating, I don't know what
I'm reading the New York Times
you're reading a comic book
I clear the morning table
while you stretch and yawn

let's go back to bed
you say with one of those looks
I read you loud and clear
and follow you from the room
it's this part of our love
where everything is right
you're a keeper baby
and I am here for good
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unrevealed

it is what lies dormant in this near past
as I reflect in this looking glass
what stays clear and what stays hidden
like ice that covers the ground but glistens
snow angels made in the afternoon sun
while grass waits for the end of winter's run

it is what I hear or cannot hear
no echoing refrains that call me near
without a lover's touch or sweet, sweet moan
reminding me as I sleep alone
no other chances, it rings crystal clear
from when you were here and since disappeared

it is what I feel or cannot feel
was it memory or was it all real
the dance with steps too complicated
like a blockbuster movie that is overrated
what I cannot see or hear or feel
with many a doubt stays unrevealed
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yesterday

in the midst of night
or just before dawn
the wind blows
it didn't wake me
that's when you slip
into thoughts
as dreams forsake
nocturnal rest

I remember it all
like yesterday
the way it feels
you're still here
a warm embrace
my touch to your face
passion burning
heart's yearning
yesterday
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Friday, June 26, 2020

never

I'll never say those words again
I'll bite my tongue and hold them in
what lays spilled and sticky on the floor
when it all gushed out that time before
I'll never say those words again

I'll never feel like that again
I'll bury it deep like unforgiven sin
what drifts in dreams, forgotten by morn
swept up like hair after its been shorn
I'll never feel like that again

I'll never hope like that again
hidden by that lovesick grin
it didn't work then nor does it now
I give you this, my solemn vow
I'll never hope like that again

I'll never say those words again
I'll bite my tongue and hold them in
what lays spilled and sticky on the floor
when it all gushed out that time before
I'll never say those words again
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roll the credits

you rode off into the sunset
like all the cowboys do
you didn't take the girl
swinging her up behind you
the clock is sticking twelve
and Cinderella lost her shoe
and what you leave behind
may someday make you blue

from the very start
you looked for the happy ending
days of many false starts
that seemed like a beginning
every love you had
it seemed like you were winning
but it never happened that way
your wheels were constantly spinning

you came here offering nothing
and with it you are leaving
the first and last don't matter
it's what happens in between
you can write the lyrics
and the music that I sing
it all plays out like a movie
roll the credits on the dark screen
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Thursday, June 25, 2020

how can I tell you?


there in your album
smiling on a page
the ghost of all the others
that leave me so outraged
those you say meant nothing
not worthy of your love
sitting tight and waiting
for a wink or a brief nod

trust is just not given
it needs to be well earned
it mixes in the metaphors
and quietly there it burns 
if they are your past
those limbs upon a tree
they just don't belong here
with you and now with me

I can't find the words to tell you
I don't know what to say

those you say meant nothing
still sitting there at bay
wondering and watching
the truth has many doubts
bless the crying angel
insecurities shall win out
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something else

I can feel it closing in
that tight feeling engulfs me
my head pounding

I have traveled this road before
instincts are not what they used to be
trusting one time too many

if I follow the signs
will I be lost forever?
or will it lead me out of the dark

the hair stands on the back of my neck
my heart tells me to proceed
my mind says something else
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indisputable

there isn't a rhyme or reason
or underlying complicated meaning
no reasons to over think it
it doesn't go exactly as planned
I either tried too hard or not hard enough
I gave too little or gave too much
this time it's indisputable
I won't even try
it's funny how it happens
in its own sweet time
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Wednesday, June 24, 2020

I give you mine

it once was have; but never hold
used to leave me in the cold
I give you mine to leave or take
to wrap in love or give heartache

if ever there is any doubts
what you put in what you take out
invest it all for a rainy day
it will shine when the sky is gray

steady baby, so few come and don't go
will you or won't you, be the one I always know?
can you build on this? a lasting tabernacle
light my way without snuffing the candle?

what I give to make your own
will make you smile when you're alone
I offer mine to leave or take
to wrap in love or give heartache
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empty handed

the rhyming comes easy
cadence makes its call
and I stand empty handed
with nothing at all
I shoot from the hip
but the aim is slightly off
and the target means nothing
nothing at all

I write the music
and you write the song
we sing it together
though we are alone
I hear the lyrics
and you feel the dance
when winter has ended
and we took a chance

we kiss and we part
and time passes quick
months have a way
of lighting a wick
the pleasures were ours
and we sing one last tune
but it is never quite over
for me and for you
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Tuesday, June 23, 2020

Mona Lisa smile

would you want it if it was perfect?
if the prize held no surprise
if the fabric stretched without wrinkles
without flaws or pills or mars
when you hold it up for inspection
you discover the golden threads
while light dances on the beauty
of the yards in softest hues

would you want it if it was perfect?
a trail without twists and turns
a gravel road that stretches out
five hundred miles or more
not charted on any printed maps
not locatable by GPS
your high beams showing all that's true
on a path that is not so daunting

would you want it if it was perfect?
a photograph in black and white
airbrushed is the quality
hiding what doesn't meet the eye
framed upon the mantle
with a Mona Lisa smile
that brings up all the questions
of what is and won't be known

would you want it if it was perfect?
if the prisoner held less fight
it they surrendered their weapon
raising a white flag in the night
would it be any more rewarding
if resistance lays unmet
if in giving up on convictions
you won the battle but lost the war
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offerings

it all bubbles forth
like uncorked champagne
the sun breaking through
after days of endless rain
and I'm feeling it all
from one simple text
I want it all--
all that comes next

I hold it close
and wrap it around
my heart's inner wall
and all that surrounds
I whisper a prayer
to the heavens above
that what you are offering
is the offering of love
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Family and Friends

Although I am far away
From family and old friends
Our hearts are linked, the feelings strong
Renewed when we meet again

There’s not always time to keep in touch
No phone calls, emails or text
Too far away for visits
Too far away to connect

But when we are together
The bonds again intertwined
It’s like there’s been no distance
No space in hearts and minds

Family and friends, sustaining ties
The kind that keep us strong
Nourishing spirit, mind and heart
that last our whole life long
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Monday, June 22, 2020

disillusioned

the moon shines on questions
deep in the dark
the sun rises unanswered
on where they are parked
maybe they are there
I just don't want to see
protecting my heart
from disillusioned beliefs

one of many days the same
there is no relief
the light doesn't beep on
a phone that just won't ring
I can't put it away,
through every pore it seeps
it won't let me rest
and it never sleeps
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reflection

read it or not
feel or forget
taste or plot
unpetted pet

laugh or cry
swim or drown
black or blue sky
does surround

happy not sad
life goes on
a lily pad
on a calm pond
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Saturday, June 20, 2020

virus (Dr. Seuss-ish)

I cannot kiss nor can I hug
I might catch the dreaded bug
must mask up and wear some gloves
6ft back don't push or shove

wash your hands, don't touch your face
stay on the X and in your place
I have Purell just in case
killing germs without a trace

they say cases are many more
since we all could go outdoors
follow the rules don't spread the spores
so this virus stops its soar.
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2020

painted lips that can not kiss
many hugs that I can't give
this horrible virus hanging thick
spreading far and very quick

fires rage the mountainside
up and down with ease it glides
people marching, killing, looting
while the laws they are diluting

copious people lose their way
while innocent ones are those that pay
lawless streets, best stay at home
as day and night the cites are roamed

too much strife to worry about
peace will come I have no doubt
this crazy year took a wrong turn
history repeats; they haven't learned
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surround myself in you

I want to wake up to the sun
smiling in your eyes
feel your arms around me
and what rises from inside
I want to grasp the freshness
of all that is new and real
water it and let it grow
observe what is revealed

I want to wrap you all around me
surround myself in you
listen to you breathing
learn each nuance, all of your hues
let me be your mirror
reflecting love and light
from early in the morning
to late each and every night
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thirty-nine

thirty-nine steps lead upward
without railing to cling to
each one a reminder
of all you took with you
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Friday, June 19, 2020

no tresspassing

posted as no trespassing
no feelings are allowed
in visions of redemption
I stagger through the crowd
the moon glows eerie with envy
confusion wets the ground
breezes soft and holy
temptation's silent sound

with mesmerizing trances
eyes search just to know
what makes flesh and body yearn
for what burns in our soul
a moral sense of duty
a tear falling from the sky
seeing is not believing
as the consequences fly

posted as no trespassing
no feelings are allowed
in visions of redemption
I stagger through the crowd
the moon glows eerie with envy
confusion wets the ground
breezes soft and holy
temptation's silent sound
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Thursday, June 18, 2020

how?

how did you get in so deep?
slip past the walls that I had built
inside the fortress high and strong
stirring up the resting silt

how did you become embedded?
in each thought and every dream
things I hold in a heart shaped box
what slept as dormant memories

how did you become so infused?
pumping hard through capillary and vein
coursing each time my heart beats
running rampant through my blood steam
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I meant it all

I meant it all right from the start
every line from every poem
every touch and warm embrace
each time my hands touched your sweet face
yeah, I meant it all

I see the prose written on the wall
I feel the song deep in my heart
I hear the guitars, feel the strings
of love that holds a deeper meaning
and what climbs blindly astride
yeah, I meant it all

I smell the smoke and feel the fire
what gets hotter as it all transpires
what is hidden swims to the top
I know that there's no way to stop
how can we just quit
yeah, I meant it all
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Wednesday, June 17, 2020

'til we get it right

let's do that again
'til we get it right
if it takes all day
it it takes all night
we could discuss
but talk is cheap
get a little closer, baby
I'll show ya what I mean

let your hands talk
like you're reading braille
your lips moving
on an ivory trail
discover the secrets
down deep inside
as we both float
on passion's tide

let's do that again
'til we get it right
if it takes all day
if it takes all night
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in the dust

I jumped the hurdles, one and all
some were big and some were small
in the dust, I watched them fall
with all their pretty little flaws

up I went, I climbed the tower
you sent pictures of many flowers
I stood close, it seemed like hours
hanging on when all seemed dour

I still check now and again
window open so I sneak in
it is not a mortal sin
this is how it all begins

disingenuous was their game
we only had our self to blame  
with a match, you set my flame
one more victory to my name

I didn't think I'd come this far
you sing sweet with no guitar
hand in hand we leave the bar
hugging close, we reached my car

three years come and three years gone
it really never seemed this long
we play, on and on and on
I changed the tempo, not the song
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Tuesday, June 16, 2020

draw the line

say the words
lance this wound
cut me and watch me bleed
make it indelible
so there's no going back
draw the line

I thought I could
but I know I was wrong
I've tried too many times
it's gone too far, I'm in too deep
my mind's lies are my heart's truths
draw the line

there aren't any songs of forever
no miracles of love lost and found
just rainy days and blues hanging lowand deliverance from pain that won't come
draw the line
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maybe

could it be that the hardest
and the right things are the same
could it be you want it all
without any of the pain
maybe you compare
maybe you judge
maybe you want it
maybe you don't

could it be you stepped over--
way across the line
could it be there are no questions
that ever cross your mind
maybe you are right
maybe you're dead wrong
maybe there's no doubt
maybe answers will not come

could it be you seek perfection
a taste of all that's true
could it be you seek an image
a mirror reflection of you
maybe you seek
maybe you will find
maybe you can
maybe you won't

could it be that what you've gained
is exactly what you had
could it be that the circumstance
leaves you feeling sad
maybe you should look
maybe you will see
maybe you are blind
maybe it was in front of you

could it be that in the future
this will all make sense
could it be that you'll look back
on memories that you missed
maybe you'll be happy
maybe some things never change
maybe you can settle
maybe not
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wander and wonder

you discover what lay buried
deep inside my soul
coffee does not warm the part
now open and exposed

left along the wayside
left without a marker
sparkling in the sunlight
shivering in the dark

one thousand days of rain and sun
while you ponder and measure
wondering if this gem will fit
inside with all you treasure

as you wander and wonder
someone discovers your find
he turns it over and over
thinking all the others were blind

a trinket in the eyes of one
a jewel in the eyes of another
a loss in the life of one
a rare find in the life of the other
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Monday, June 15, 2020

Brushing past

I can’t touch that part of you
That wall can not be breached
You won’t let down your defenses
That separate you from me

Stuck in a chain of moments
That were not meant to last
Telling it to my memories
When I relive the past

Face down in recollection
From the time that you were here
Moving in your own direction
Brushing past when I was near

I don’t know what you’re seeking
Maybe you don’t know your self
But it wasn’t me you were looking for
Or love in and of itself

Keep your heart protected
Don’t let down the wall
But the loneliness that surrounds you
Won’t protect you from the fall
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caught

in the timber way up north
a cabin by a cool, deep lake
alert and watchful here I lay
always tossing wide awake

fish swim deep in cooling fathoms
waiting to get  teased then caught
like an unrequited lover
feeling all that love has wrought

walking in the early morning
crunching feet on fallen cones
reminiscing, always remembering
the years of what is sharply honed

coming to that still sweet spot
where passion was once sweetly born
was it only yesterday
where now the weeds have overgrown
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senses

I still remember the way you taste
ambrosia when I lick my lips
honey sweet--inviting me
to sample and enjoy

I still remember the way you feel
your warm breath against my skin
hands that slide as we hit our stride
fulfilling each and every part

I still remember the sweet perfume
hanging heavily--permeating the room
as the sun slips from the dusky sky
and lunar light filters in

I still remember the lyrics that play
over and over in my mind
music we write to this dance we do
strumming softly in the night

I still remember the vision reflected
in every thought, in every mirror
all of these senses can not lie
or hide all of this that stays inside
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Saturday, June 13, 2020

shell game

I know you were here for a reason
but it beats the heck out of me
as you give me another lame excuse
thinking I can't solve this mystery
your sleight of hand may be real quick
a shell game in which you believe
but you've forgotten my magical power
of seeing into hidden things

here we sit in the same room
but we're not in the same place
we do the dance and sing the songs
as we both stare off into space
you turn left and I turn right
the moon goes behind a cloud
it's not a win, it's not a loss
as love shuffles away in the crowd
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center stage

I rehearsed the lines for the center of your stage
I knew every word by heartI knew the lyrics to every score
that the orchestra would have started
I knew the backdrops for every scene
the costumes to be worn
I knew my cues, and all yours too
as I waited at your stage-door
I knew I was the understudy
when I tried out for the role
I waited in the wings, with arias to singto a heart that was already stolen
but still I waited, anticipated
the time for me would come
the curtain won't rise, to my surprise
after the last not is strummed
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Thursday, June 11, 2020

wild things

my dreams made up of wonder
my back laying in tall grass
trying to see the Milky Way
and what the stars have cast
a spell that I am under
my eyes are open wide
becoming one with sky and moon
in clouds I testify

nothing else comes close
to this bliss--this ecstasy
oozing out of every pour
purged deep from inside of me
it soaks the ground around me
flooding into the desert wash
wild things come to quench their thirst
drinking their fill from what runs off
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petals

in between the petals
where the sweetness lays
moisture forms like condensation
on glass from humidity
joy lingers by the candle's glow,
long into the night
with lunar beam comes a sweet dream
--half reality, half fantasy
I wake at dawn, stretch and yawn,
languid in your arms
knowing when you slip
inside this vaporous mist
I'll catch you when you fall
I'll catch you when you fall
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Wednesday, June 10, 2020

my song

there is a song I keep deep inside
no one has ever heard it before
there is a small crack that light shines through
ajar now is that door
I think I can sing this to you

can you write the music and the melody?
can you hear the whisper of the words I sing?
if I hum a few bars will you sing it with me?
this song that plays in my soul
this song I want you to know
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pinned dreams

you are in my heart
you're dotting every i
you're in every thought
that crosses across my mind
you're there in my hopes
and on the end of my line
when my cellphone beeps
it's you every time

as I pin each dream
on each little star
each time I turn around
right there you always are
no rain on the horizon
just skies of purest blue
each dream in my heart
is all because of you
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all nighter

sometimes I go back and visit your memory
rattle the chains, remember what used to be
but the ghosts can't hold me close or kiss like you
I'm tired of these dreams and waking up feeling blue

so I pull an all nighter, stay up 'til dawn creeps in
thinkin I can get past just how it all began
but it doesn't go away, none of these ideas fade
baby, there's no pleasure in all these shades of gray

it plays over and over, always the same routine
when I fall asleep, you over take my dreams
now when I'm awake, no part of you can I shake
just what you left behind, lonely memories and this heartbreak
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Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Tuesday, June 9, 2020

shy of the moon

I keep having the same old dream
where waves brake high on violent seas
where wind blows stars out of clear nights
and I drift aimlessly by the shy of the moon

I've read the books to uncover the meaning
to end this nightmare and this voiceless screaming
but clear understanding I am not receiving
as I go down in the undertow by the shy of the moon

all of my prayers and my Christian beliefs
are not a preserver and won't save me
and while my guardian angel sleeps
I go down for the third time
by the shy of the moon
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Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

crash

we board on separate tarmacs
for this flight to love's sweet haven
in our needing, love not fleeting
we get what we are craving

but somewhere over the mountains
during our span of glorious days
turbulence shakes our foundation
in just too many ways

this flight that took off smoothly
and those break-ups that we cheated
we would have continued unscathed, if only
my heart hadn't crashed at your feet
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Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

adieu

I'll take just one day
all the time you can spend
all the love you can lend

I'll take just one night
as passion reignites
and my dreams materialize

I'll take these few hours
till morning when we bid adieu
my mind can't stop my heart
from loving you
Creative Commons License
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Monday, June 8, 2020

inspire

on a crisp white page
I pen the words
flowing like lyrics
to my favorite song
and you inspire me
to be all I can be
and the simpleness of this
fills my heart
Creative Commons License
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

moving target

like a bullet through the barrel
hitting the dead-on center
steady on the trigger
as it makes that clicking sound
a full clip loaded in the grip
as I fire another round
it's not close to being finished
cause I'm just getting started

a silhouette on a wire
with circles for my sight
crippling the paper intruder
as I fire each new round
the feeling of power grips me
when I hit my mark
as I pop one in the chamber
firing one right after another

I flip the switch and bring it
closer for me to admire
looking at the clean-through holes
riddled in this paper
I roll up the cardboard
another "picture" for my garage
but what I have discovered is
I can't hit a moving target
Creative Commons License
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

it doesn't matter

it doesn't matter what I'm feeling
or if the fantasy is done
it doesn't matter when we're together
or when I am alone
it doesn't matter if the dance
lasted longer than the song
it really doesn't matter
it doesn't matter much at all

it doesn't matter that the sweetness
dried up and withered away
it doesn't matter that the illusion
evaporated with the dreams
it doesn't matter that the sleight of hand
was faster than I could see
it really doesn't matter
it doesn't matter much at all

it doesn't matter that I loved you
with the truest conviction
it doesn't matter that it wasn't returned
I held fast with predilection
it doesn't matter that it's over
and the crimson line is drawn
it really doesn't matter
it doesn't matter much at all

it doesn't matter that the stars
glow brighter than the moon
it doesn't matter that the sun
still finds me awake at dawn
it doesn't matter that I don't sleep
cause then you don't appear
it really doesn't matter
to you and now not to me
Creative Commons License
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Saturday, June 6, 2020

it all just fits

sometimes it all comes together
sometimes it all just fits
it's like finding the lost piece of a puzzle
or maybe it's just kismet

it's like knowing all the answers to Mensa
or the jeans that meet every contour
it's like meeting your favorite entertainer
when he's on the road doing a tour

it's like living a never ending dream
like stock that finally turns a profit
sometimes it all comes together
sometimes it all just fits

yeah, sometimes it all just fits
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Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

the way you love me


birds soaring way up in my blue sky
flowers are in bloom from the monsoon when it cries
Nina on my MP3, crooning in my ear
I'm feelin good, it's been awhile since my soul was here

ghosts are laying dormant from a not too distant past
the arrow tips on the scale, don't know how long it will last
I know that while I'm in this place, it's all as it should be
I'm feeling the rush, a royal flush, loving the way you love me

I'm loving the way you love me

the sun sets on the horizon, the moon is on the rise
all I see is my reflection, mirrored in your eyes
unadulterated passion and your heart's sincerity
I'm holding fast, hooked really bad, loving the way you love me

I'm loving the way you love me

Creative Commons License
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License