fragile or not

on the outside I'm a diamond 

my edges cut through glass

I am up for challenges

rally to each task 

I make my own decisions 

and stand by every one 

I shoot quick from the hip 

my aim again right on 

inside I am soft, 

as fragile as a pearl 

lustrous I shine--

delicate underneath

I won't let much get close 

they see the charade too late 

perfect  am not...

nor never claimed to be

I don't mean to maim others 

and won't let them maim me

if I can't make things better

then I will let them be 

I say this from the first, 

as slowly it begins 

you are one of the few, 

that I'm letting in 

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

epitaph

a heart now broken
shattered, buried deep, entombed
epitaph of love

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

Tombstone

Walking on the wooden slats 

Past the hitching posts 

Where cowboys tied their trusty steeds 

A town with many ghosts 

A boomtown that was lawless 

With Doc and all the Earps 

Past the Bird Cage Theatre 

Where entertainment was rehearsed 

Into the famous Big Nose Kate’s 

With outlaws playing cards 

Hiding ace’s in their sleeves 

The danger disregarded 

Apparitions of saloon hags 

And six gun toting men 

Of silver miners in dusty clothes 

In this smoky, godless den 

Pick up the Tombstone Epitaph 

To read the local news 

No one shot and no one robbed

According to these reviews 

What must it have been like

In this wild and wicked town 

In the late 1880’s 

When this boomtown was founded 

History was in the making 

A county seat able to survive

For tourists like us on afternoons 

To see that it still thrives 

As we drive North and leave this place 

Past legendary Boot Hill

 All the ghosts put back to rest 

Though it still may raise some chills

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

going back haiku

back to the Midwest
fond memories that return
rebuilding my core

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

silent

the words fell silent
on deafened ears
no one to listen
no one to hear
quietly screaming
wanting to be heard
missing their mark
as I thought they would
quelling of anger
I'm misunderstood

a waste of my time
in an angry world

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

blacktop haiku

a country blacktop
no dotted lines to divide
I find my own way

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

till we die

if I could see beyond today
past the hurt that I still save
the future in a crystal ball
past the portraits in your hall

in every corner past all the dust
going for broke--do or bust
ghosts scream incessantly in my ear
I listen to them voice all of my fears

on two wheels I round the bend
is it a beginning or nearing the end?
a trophy sits, high on the shelf
winning more than anything else

I want it all and I won't share
talking just won't get me there
yelling hush, you kiss my lips
my hands stay firmly on my hips

hidden deep inside a box
all the secrets stay there locked
till you forget and walk away
none there are in a safe place

I read them all, each and every one
from when we started--it wasn't fun
denial is such an ugly truth
in black and white they lie to you

once again, I hide all pain
till I think I'm going insane
it means nothing--words inside
meant to stay there till we die

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Midwest

Running through the fresh mown grass
Small town there in the Midwest
We laugh, we fall, we roll around
How our lives seemed oh so blessed

Then as we get older
Our lives begin to change
Not enough time in the day
There’s much to arrange

Seems like we’re always running
Our schedules are to tight
Kids and spouses, work and bosses
Mandating our lives

Somehow we lose our innocence
And start to become jaded
The Midwest fun of younger days
Has now completely faded

Being a child was easy
Back in the Midwest
Adulthood seemed so far away
The future was a guess

red flags haiqua

there were warning signs 

my heart sails pass red flags 

blinded by passion

refusing to come about

 
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

withdrawn

the effort put forth, a little too much
I did it though, to keep you in touch
thought you should know and you would care
but it settled in without her there

a little to calm, acknowledgement noted
no pain rendered, or sympathy spoken
I guess I expected a somber retreat
but you carried on without missing a beat

was it all in my head, that thing that was there?
did you really not want it or just didn't care?
in heavy thoughts always swimming to light
here in the morning and there late at night

I guess I won't know, I can put it aside
it really doesn't matter, it seems to have died
there it was yesterday, but now it is gone
physically taken, the memories withdrawn
Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

swimming at night

dive in deep from cool cement 

chlorinated water above my head 

breath held deep with ease I glide 

swimming with you side by side 

under stars we slowly churn 

eyes shut tight against the burn 

surface break in the still night 

you disappear from my third eye

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

paradoxical sleep

Random thoughts at arbitrary times
A life once shared how quick demised
Thoughts that swim in water deep
Nightmares in paradoxical sleep

You watch me flail, in over my head
Drift in and out while I mournfully tread
Choke out the water that’s in my throat
Silently drown or stay afloat

You were here and now you’re gone
Ash still falling with each new dawn
A life invested extinguished fast
Promise yielded to aftermath

Strength for all so they don't see
A tower that crumbles inwardly
Internal tears that my heart cries
The perfected façade is just a guise

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

love, as it relates to baseball

I stand on the plate with the sun in my eyes
the pitcher is ready, a fastball he flies
I swing just as hard as I possibly can
love says "strike one" as I try again

choke up on the bat, pull down on my bill
nodding my head, a new pitcher on the hill
it hurls past my chest, just missing my heart
love says "ball one" as the clock again starts

it's the seventh inning stretch, I need the relief
I brush off the dust, no way I'll retreat
the coach saunters over, giving me a pep talk
as the lines are redrawn on the infield with chalk

the board shows each tally, each inning not close
no intervention from heaven or its holy hosts
I shut the book on yet, another losing season
I'll still play the game with faith in the reasons

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

Facade

I built this façade 

so very tall 

no one can penetrate

through these thick walls 

I learned from my childhood 

from the forts that I built 

how to engineer 

how to protect

my skills became stronger 

no infiltration can come 

safe from all dangers 

I will not succumb 

so I stand at my post 

observant of all

nothing gets past me 

no peril will fall 

when the time finally comes 

someone special will come through 

until that time 

I will stand guard for you 

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

All There Is

On this day, most special 

Sunshine, smiles and flowers 

Things that dreams are made of 

Exchanging rings and vows 

Pledging of eternal love 

A future for us two 

Standing at the alter 

As we say “I do” 

 Always work together 

Be loving, loyal and true

End each argument with a kiss 

Give and take in all we do 

I wish us a lifetime of happiness 

I wish us a future of bliss 

I wish us a lifetime of lasting dreams 

I wish us all there is

  Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

a tired mind

inside my mind, where silence eludes

too many tabs open

what am I to do?

thoughts, all at once

tumbling all around

answers not coming

at least, none that I've found

late into night

but there is no change

ideas escaping

and riding the range

next to me, you slumber

but my sleep won't come

tossing and turning

on and on my thoughts drum

no rest for the wicked

well, at least not for me

quiet that escapes

even though it's free

maybe I will nap

a least I can try

a few winks of zzzzz's

for my tired mind

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

pages

as I write this pages
by dim candlelight
the ending a mystery
hidden from my sight
I jot down the secrets
that I've never told
when the day was so hot
but the wind blows too cold

many promises broken
angry words that were said
in the white heat of anger
things I won't confess
these pages of love
the ink that's still wet
from the love that I feel
given without regret

the battle I waged
that was met with defeat
I would refight that war
although no easy feat
a chapter on heaven
a chapter on hell
although the latter's
the place where I dwell

I've lost track of the pages
and where this all leads
drawing difficult conclusions
after numerous misleads

erasures, redoing 

sometimes of all lines

thesaurus was handy

and used many times

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License.

I can

I can be your warmth 
the light of your moon
the stardust at night
when sleep comes to you
the minutes in each hour
of every single day
a song from your heart
over and over I play

I can be the sweetness of wine
refreshment for your soul
instilling my spirit
making you again whole
the taste of ambrosia
honey on your lips
braille to a blind love
read with fingertips

I can be your searchlight 
a beacon for rough seas
bringing you homeward
keeping you safe with me
cold, wet and tired
hungry for some peace
a bandage for your heart
that will no longer bleed

Good Bye

I knew that it was coming
could feel it in my bones
Slowly you’re departing
and leaving me alone

It all went by so quickly
these moments that we shared
And looking back it seems
you were the answer to a prayer

You came when I was lonely
you helped to get me through
I think it was a pleasure
just being there with you

Thanks for what you gave me
the lessons and the time
Thanks for being what you were
when I thought that you were mine

against the wall

baby, you had me against the wall
the kisses long and deep
while all around the music surrounds
this dance that we can't keep

it fills my days and haunts my nights
whenever my dreams do come
these stolen moments that we make
memories to which we succomb

I burn it to my memory
like songs to a new disc
steps we've added with each new score
to play over and over like this

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

lessons we don't learn

I told my head a fairy tale 

to keep my heart in tact 

it kept me warm for many nights

reflections when looking back 

the images are hazy 

the faces not as clear 

the music not as sweet now 

as it slowly disappears 

that last time that we shared some wine 

using tiles we spelled it out 

the valley of the sun awaits 

where three is just a crowd 

you run to the mountains 

to let your heart roam free 

I cross the border into Mexico 

to give my soul relief 

the kiss you left is bittersweet

or that's the way it seems

when I close my eyes 

you're no longer in my dreams

you may be getting closer 

but that's not how it appears 

saguaro don't hold answers 

for all of your deepest fears

 

you can love without me 

I found  I could be brave 

while all those feelings get buried 

but it's a shallow grave 

photos fade to memory

etched inside my heart

there's no going back now

the end to all false starts

the fingers numb that light the fuse 

on lessons we don't learn 

wax drips down the side of hope 

on a candle now twice burned

I realize fire would never fit 

the perfection that you yearned

I have drifted out to sea

now that the tide has turned

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

shallow grave

the darkness and confusion lifts
I do not bring the rain, which you embrace
but the sun briefly, into a cold sky
as I make a clouded descent
into the realms of your reality
I lay fantasy aside
covering it with Irish lace
and burying it in a shallow grave
as your heart's freedom sprouts wings
and flies away into the night

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

deep blue sea

in the deep blue sea where fishes school

in seaweed thick, or shallow pools

currents play without remorse

sweeping waves on a violent course

listen to the whispers of each wave

of pirates lost to early graves

wooden ships rest on bottom sand

maybe to be discovered again

drifting above with full blown sail

coming about with much detail

on we go with steady keel

listing next to harbor seals

the sun dips gently in the west

a wonderful day that we were blessed

wet feet step in once smooth sand

I can't wait to sail again

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

I do

I waited for you through those endless nights
without a moon, by dimming starlight
even though I knew, that I had no right
I held you there in my crosshair sights

on two wheels, as you roamed about
never keeping true to your distant route
looking for something and your own bail out
as monsoons drenched the midsummer's drought

always searching, nada did we find
most of the searching, a complete waste of time
you stood with yours and I stood with mine
I would venture to say, it wasn't sublime

things finally changing, how quickly it seems
no broken heart, just realized dreams
it was just what happens, the thick scheme of things
a knot firmly tied in our silver heart strings

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License

summer

piece by piece it comes apart 

like a tattered cloak that frays 

once a complicated heart 

has found a simpler way 

something that is very real 

a truth that I can touch 

this feeling that I cling to now

and grasp tight in my clutch

it's all I ever wanted  

I was just in the wrong place 

as it is revealed to me 

grace shines its loving face 

depleting once a heavy load 

now that weight has lifted 

this path I chose is the right road 

and I'm no longer drifting 

I once held the winter's son 

tightly in my grip 

I fought hard, ne'er a battle won

that was the gist of it 

it came too slow the letting go

and the soul I once laid bare 

days of snow and bitter cold 

on the trail that I blazed there 

what stayed in a winter wonderland

now blossoms green with spring

the hourglass with shifting sand 

sweet memories that it brings 

I don't regret, I won't forget 

in tissue packed away 

the letting go of all that's left 

as my summer comes to stay

Poetry by M.J.B. is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License